Websites taken down across Europe ahead of critical cyber-security update
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What's this about?
Two critical vulnerabilities have been identified with PHP, a programming language which is widely used across the internet.
The one-panel cartoon
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A dimly lit data center with rows of humming servers and blinking lights, where a technician in a hard hat is holding a large sign that reads 'Warning: PHP Vulnerabilities' next to a server rack labeled 'Critical Websites Down for Security Update'
Caption: When the internet goes to sleep for a PHP nap
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Based on the original story on bbc.co.uk.
Editor's note
The coordinated takedown of vulnerable websites across Europe highlights the ever-present threat of cyber attacks and the urgent need for regular security updates. It's a sobering reminder that even the most ubiquitous technologies can be exploited, underscoring the importance of proactive cybersecurity measures.
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Panel 1
(a) What the subject of this story actually is and does: PHP is a widely-used programming language that powers a significant portion of websites and web applications. The recent discovery of critical vulnerabilities in PHP means that many sites need to be taken offline temporarily to apply security updates, which can be disruptive. (b) The ONE real irony or absurdity in the news: The irony lies in the fact that while PHP is so ubiquitous and crucial for many websites, it also poses significant security risks that require regular updates, leading to widespread site outages. (c) The single funniest observation that becomes the highlight: The highlight is the absurdity of a world where the internet, which is supposed to be always on and available, has to take a collective break for maintenance. ---
Panel 2
*Inside a small office, a middle-aged tech worker, JIM, sits in front of a computer screen showing a PHP code editor. The screen is flickering with error messages. A stack of papers and a coffee mug sit on his desk. Jim looks worried.*
Jim: Ugh, another PHP update. Why can't they just make it bulletproof?
Panel 3
*The office has a whiteboard with a list of websites that need to be taken down for updates. Jim is staring at the list, which includes popular sites like and Jim’s face shows a mix of frustration and disbelief.*
Narrator: NewsNow.com,
Narrator: BankOfYou.com,
Narrator: ShoppingCartWorld.com.
Jim: Why do I always get the short end of the stick? It’s like the internet’s going to sleep for a week.
Panel 4
*Jim is now in a cafe, holding a laptop and sipping coffee. Around him, people are staring at their phones and looking confused. One person is frantically typing on a laptop, another is talking on the phone in frustration.* *Everyone around him looks up, bewildered.* *Everyone looks at each other, realizing the absurdity of the situation.*
Jim: Hey, did you guys hear? The internet’s getting a check-up. We’re all on lockdown for a bit.
Customer: What do you mean, lockdown?
Jim: It’s just like when you get a cold. The whole system needs to rest and recover.
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